Dad - A Son’s first Hero & A Daughter’s first Love

Everyone can become a father; but it takes a special person to be a “DAD”

Thirty plus years and I till count on my dad for being a special person in my life. I always remember him for his witty and humorous side and always play a gentlemen role in the social life and also in his political life. I adore him a lot for his extreme patience; At times his extreme furious nature will turn the house upside down. My elder sister is the only one who can calm him down and bring him back to normalcy.

 When I asked for a motorcycle during my college days, he asked me how much would the motorcycle cost? I was thinking that my dad is asking the cost to arrange for the finances. I replied that it would cost around fifty thousand rupees. He said I don’t want my son to ride a fifty thousand vehicle; I will get you lakhs worth vehicle, in which you can enjoy your ride with lots of company. Perplexed by his reply, I asked him what is that vehicle. He gave me a fitting reply – its government state transport bus. You get into that bus, get the ticket to your destination, till you reach the destination you are one of the owner of the vehicle. It was his quick wit made us to laugh for a while. 

Summer vacations are meant to be interesting for the kids– where the life learning takes place, apart from the academic learning. My dad was keen in teaching me those life learning – swimming, cycling, teaching me the simple farming maneuvers in our land, techniques in keeping the sparrows and other birds away from the fields and many more.

My mom once took all my sisters, cousins to nearby town for a movie. Excited for the movie, our gang of twelve kids was running in the town to reach the theater on time. Suddenly my dad in his bullet came in front of us and asked where you guys are running.  I said that we are going to the cinemas to watch a tamil movie. My dad furiously looked at my mom and yelled at her and said that she is spoiling us by taking them to movies rather using our holidays meaningful and useful.   Those days, our family was ultra orthodox under my grandparent’s influence.  My mom was bit worried about the evening reaction of my dad at home. But we the kids dint bothered much and were fighting to get the best seats to view the screen. During interval, two strangers walked towards us with ice-cream cones and popcorn in their hands. They started serving us and we could not resist to say no the stranger and to that delicious icecream. I took the first cone and started tasting the cone. My mom who is always particular on our behaviors, forced me to stop eating the ice cream. The strangers told my mom that a person sitting in the last row had requested them to deliver it to these kids.  We took a sudden turn in the last row to have a look on the good stranger. There my dad was sitting and smiling at all of us. My mom was happy to see him and she was relieved that there would be no evening dramas. That was my dad who gives me surprises all times and took special care of our needs.

His social and political life grew exponentially and he was elected as vice-chairman for local municipal council. Though I could not campaign for him in the election fray and I took part in his victorious march after the election results were declared. I can see people greeting him with flowers and shawls in all the villages and households. I was there as a stranger and silently observing my dad’s influence among the general public. I was taken to stage by the party workers and I refused them with smile. I was there as a mere spectator proudly watching my dad’s triumph. I was stunned to see opponent parties at my residence next day greeting my dad’s victory. That was his real accomplishments in all the years of political life. He has friends and well-wishers from all walks of life and cutting across from all the parties.

The end of 2014 was a nightmare and terrible in my life. I got a call from my brother-in-law that dad is serious and they are rushing him to a higher centre in Chennai. My mom was sobbing, every time when I called her to get his health updates. It took thirteen hours journey for me to reach the hospital in Chennai. Meanwhile my dad was looking for me every now and then and asking mom about my whereabouts.  

I reached late evening and my dad was taking rest. He was so weak and fragile and I slowly pressed his legs to give him a comfort. He woke up to my gesture and smiled at me. The hour of silence was sober and solemn and I had a strong prediction that some dreadful event got to happen. Later by an hour, my dad was coughing blood profusely. Being a medical profession, I knew the dangers of massive hameoptysis.     (Medical Condition where the patient coughs blood from the lungs) He has coughed more than thousand milliliters of blood and gave me a strong intrusion his lungs are very bad. We rushed him to super-specialty hospital. The ambulance siren and the monitors beep sound made my heart pounding. I was crying, weeping and praying to all gods, I kept my eyes closed and I was not having enough strength and courage to look at the monitors showing my dad’s waning vital signs.

The casualty medical officers acted swiftly and their timely intervention was well received by dad’s damaged lungs.  The bouts of hameoptysis stopped and dad reached to semi-conscious state. The medical officers kept him in casualty and I was allowed to sit next to him. Covered with hospital linen, connected with all sorts of medical monitoring devices my dad said to me in feeble voice – Go and have your dinner and take some rest. My eyes welled up in tears and I controlled it.

Early in the morning, the massive hameoptysis recurred with even more quantity of blood. I can see his oxygen saturation level dipping down below 60%, heart rate dropping to 55 beats per minute, respiratory rate escalating to 30 breaths, pupils dilated and poorly reacting to light.  He was sinking and all the parameters were tumbling.  I signed a bunch of papers agreeing to the risks and dangers of my dad’s life threatening condition. I was visualizing the battle of life and death of choking blood logged lungs, stilled heart coughing and life trying to sputtering back over death in the corridors of emergency ward. 

Soon my dad was intubated orally and connected to mechanical ventilator, sedated to keep the cough reflex down, central femoral arterial line placed to monitor the real-time blood pressure and obtain samples for arterial blood gas analysis, central venous line in the internal juglar vein to push life-saving medicines into his heart in case of medical emergency, nurses busy in suctioning the endo-tracheal tube often to remove the fresh blood with ryles tube inserted into the stomach for formula feeding.

I had not even thought that one day; I will be in medical ICU monitoring my dad as a critically ill patient. Having adequate medical knowledge and experience in handling critically ill patients made me to think worse. I was anticipating all other associated complications – worrying about his renal functions, fluid balance to maintain mild hypotension, oxygen saturation levels and many more.

Seven days in critical care unit and my family members went through enough mental trauma, agony and grief.  I could not concentrate much on other things, enquiring the nurses about the quantity and color of bleeding from the endotracheal tube. The treatment was more complex involving a set of corporate doctors headed by pulmonologist with cardio thoracic surgeons, critical care medicine specialists, infection disease specialist, oncologists and radiologists as a single team. I was worried about the oncology part and the biopsy and bronchoscope revealed no cancerous lesion in the pulmonary tissue. That report was a real blessing in a disguise for me.   

We dint allowed our mom to see my dad connected with bizarre medical equipments and breathing his life on ventilators in that debilitating condition. Meanwhile, I was worried about the prolonged intubation leading to pneumonia, dreadly Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus (MRSA) infection,  tracheostomy and all others. It was my fickle medical mind kept me haunting all the times.

Slowly the bleeding stopped and dad returned to semiconscious. The doctors planned to extubate him and I was worried again about his saturation level. By eighth day, he was extubated from the ventilator and connected to venturri mask with 100 % oxygen support. Thankfully, his oxygen saturation level maintained and the oxygen support was tapered gradually. He was shifted to the room and my mom was very much happy to see him back.  I saw the tears rolling out from her eyes and holding the saree end to wipe the tears. I was too emotional and thanked all gods and almighty for answering all our prayers.    But those days will be the most precarious of my life.

Forty five days later with intense medications, he was discharged and we moved to my sister’s residence. After those anguish days, I saw my dad taking my niece for a small leisurely walk in the garden telling her stories and answering to her inquisitive questions. That was the moment; I was longing to see him back with us.

Dad is always my first hero and I could not imagine my life without him. Though we had spent limited time together, I always have a special bonding towards him.   He is so special to me because he wanted me to the best, he gave me the best of life, he sacrificed most of his life to me and in fact he lived his life for me.